July 2010
Today's adventure:
I went to see Dinner For Schmucks tonight with my brother. I know, I know. It’s not the most intelligent movie choice, but come on. I have to say that even though it wasn’t the funniest movie ever, there were some scenes in that movie that were so hilariously genius that I didn’t know what to do with myself. Steve Carell was absolute comedy. However, the merit of the movie is not...
Stephen Colbert
just read a transcript of a cat fight on one of “The Real Housewives” shows with David Cohen. It may have been the funniest thing I have ever seen.
Facebook
IS ALIVE WITH THE BUZZ OF THE JERSEY SHORE.
I cannot wait for
Biutiful, the soon to be released highlight of Cannes. Alejandro Gonzalez Innaritu making a movie with Javier Bardem as the lead seems like fate. It’s about a crumbling man trying to save himself and his family in the underground of Barcelona? I need to see this now.
“This crowd has gone deadly silent, a Cinderella story outta nowhere. Former...”
– The greatest groundskeeper of all time (Bill Murray)
I just watched
The White Ribbon, and I have to say it is hands down one of the most beautiful movies I have ever seen. However, I’m not really sure what happened. I mean, a lot of stuff happened, but it just kind of ended. Who the hell committed the crimes? If anyone has seen this, I’d appreciate some insight. Throughout the movie I just felt an extreme sense of disquietude, but I’m not...
Dear screaming 14 year-old girl,
Why the hell are you wearing an “I Heart Barack Obama” shirt? Is it because you think he’s a great president? Do you have any idea in hell what he does or stands for? No? Ok, so don’t support some one just because it’s “COOL.” The same goes for Che Fucking Guevara.
Sincerely,
Me
Moby - Porcelain
This song will never not be...
apio asked: Yup, I hadn't seen it before. I kept meaning to, especially since I wanted to watch it in theaters (I love the director), but I didn't get a chance to go when I was at school and had very little time since I'd been working most of summer. But it was SO. GOOD. It just felt so cleverly made and extremely well put-together, and of course downright enjoyable. The best scene was...
Job prospects for Tony Hayward →
This is absolutely hilarious. (taken from the Esquire Politics Blog)
Things I did over the past two days:
Drove to the shore BLARING Moby
Ate obscene amounts of junk food (really though, obscene amounts)
Stayed on the Wildwood boardwalk until the wee hours of the morning
Made it through a field of laser beams (like in bank heist movies)
Won a giant bag of Sour Patch Kids (WATERMELON)
Watched guidos, even guido fathers, try and prove their strength in a punch strength calculator game (seriously...
I just watched
The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo. Now I’ve been absolutely obsessed with Stieg Larsson’s books ever since I was introduced to Salander in the first novel. I just finished the third of the trilogy the other day, and I decided it was time to watch the Swedish film adaptation of the first novel. My house was empty tonight, so I figured it would be a good time to man the couch and watch the...
-Cold War Kids, Audience
“Deep summer is when laziness finds respectability.”
– Sam Keen (via aconversationoncool)
I want to walk in the woods
I took this picture of my best friend Claire in the woods near my house. She, as you can see, is beautiful. I miss her. Sorry for the nostalgia.
It's a TWISTERRRRRRRRRR
THERE ARE TORNADO WARNINGS FOR MY COUNTY! LIGHTNING IS STRIKING ALL AROUND MY HOUSE! THE THUNDER IS LITERALLY DEAFENING! (not really literally) HOLY HOLY HOLY SHIT!
I just watched
Gran Torino, and I totally forgot how amazing it really is. Clint Eastwood makes everything a classic.
While standing in line at the grocery store:
Matt: Ok if you could do any person on the front of these magazines who would it be?
Me: Ummm... I'm not sure. I need to think.
Kersten: Matt stop that kid will hear you. (Points to small boy in front of us)
Matt: He can't hear us. Seriously who would it be.
Kersten: Matt, stop!
Matt: Sex
Kersten: Stop!
Matt: Vagina
Kersten: Stop!
Matt: Dick
Kersten: STOP!
(The boy turns and looks at Matt)
(Matt waves)
Matt: Kersten stop yelling.
Apparently,
I am of a rare breed on tumblr. ARE THERE ANY OTHER STRAIGHT MEN ON TUMBLR? No? Damn.
UGH
Nothing like some early morning yard work to start this sweltering day. I am literally covered in dirt.
Things I did tonight:
- lost an epic best of three volleyball game under the lights (disapointing but fun)
- attended a “golf pros and tennis hoes” themed party (the outfits were interesting to say the least)
- judged a beer chugging contest between my friend and a very large man (very entertaining)
- was asked, “So what’s it like to be the loser at parties?” (kind of humiliating) (I...
Shocked and appalled
As you may know, the twenty third Bond film has encountered some problems, well… just generally being made. With the future of MGM, Bond’s father so to speak, in jeopardy, the film has been put on hold indefinitely. This has created some buzz surrounding Bond himself, and this is my issue. I just read an article on the Esquire webpage that predicted who the next Bond actor would be....
“I fell asleep during Inglorious Basterds and Death Proof made me yawn. Kill Bill...”
– someone made the mistake of asking me to talk about movies on formspring (via drinkyourjuice)
Tarantino sucks the big one.
Inception was...
good. It was a good movie. It was suspenseful, well paced, and completely original, but the people who are already talking about academy awards need to sit down and chill out. First of all, it’s July. That’s early, and the winter rush of Oscar hopefuls is far far away. Secondly, Inception doesn’t have the potential to be a serious Oscar contender. It just doesn’t. There...
“I’m an underwater person. I love underwater. Underwater is my favorite.”
– small boy in the baby pool
I could...
go to sleep in a bluesy haze of depression, or…
I could watch REQUIEM FOR A DREAM. The latter it shall be.
apio asked: LOL oh lawd i've had so many a discussion on this very topic. To put it simply: I’m not a Scorsese fan. The Departed is one of my all-time favorite films but I hated Gangs of New York, haaaaaaated the Aviator (after looking forward to it for so long too; it remains the only movie I've ever walked out of the theater during and one of my biggest film let-downs ever), and was...
Today's Adventure
Today at work I had the unfortunate experience of being hounded by a raging pack of middle school girls. While we were on break, my friend and I went over to the volleyball court to hit the ball around. Before we knew it, we were surrounded by giddy tweens screaming things like “Sexy serve!” and “She thinks you’re hot!” “No I don’t!” “Yes she...
Congratulations M.I.A.
“Born Free” is the worst song ever. Were you on mind-altering drugs when you decided to put it into existence? Probably. Just because your song has some sort of subliminal message beneath the sounds of trash cans falling on kittens and rats raping each other does not mean it’s good. WOW.
